Writing Rooted in Lived Experience Carries Immense Power

Keywords

Utopian Haven (世外桃源): Refers to Dali, an idealized lifestyle disconnected from reality.
Survivor’s Guilt (幸存者愧疚): Guilt felt for one’s comfort while others face hardship.
Wild Swimming (野游): Swimming in natural waters, symbolizing the pursuit of freedom and self.
Memory Champion (记忆冠军): Refers to Germany’s efforts and achievements in reflecting on historical wrongs.
Openness (开放性): The expansive and inclusive nature of topics, accommodating diverse issues.

Summary

This episode of Untimely features journalist and writer Yang Xiao, who discusses her experiences living and creating in Dali. Yang Xiao admits that Dali’s “utopian haven” lifestyle initially triggered “survivor’s guilt,” and “lying flat” is not a sustainable solution; creation must remain connected to real life. She shares how “wild swimming” helped her overcome fear and reshape her sense of self, alongside her deep reflections on German history. Yang Xiao also compares her roles as journalist and writer, emphasizing the “openness” and “lush vitality” of topic selection, advocating that creators maintain independence, balance market and institutional demands, and face era changes with “resolve.”

Insights

The content reveals the complex emotions surrounding ideal lifestyles versus real-world dilemmas in the pandemic era.
Reflections on Dali’s “utopian haven” highlight a critique of escaping reality and a yearning for authentic living.
Reflections on German history offer new perspectives for understanding current global dynamics and identity.

Opinions

01「Creation Must Connect with Real Life」

Prolonged detachment in a “lying flat” state leads to creative exhaustion; creators need ties to real life and society to spark inspiration.

02 「Openness and Lush Vitality in Topic Selection Are Crucial」

Effective topics should be open and expansive, embracing diverse issues and evoking a “lush vitality” to imbue works with life and impact.

03 「Creators Should Maintain Independence, Balancing Market and Institutional Demands」

Creators should ideally sustain themselves through the market but understand institutional choices, striking a balance to preserve creative independence and freedom.

In-Depth

Reflections on Dali’s “Utopia”: Journalist Yang Xiao’s Journey of Living and Creating

The past three years of the pandemic have profoundly reshaped people’s lifestyles and values. Dali, once seen as an escape from urban chaos, now prompts new reflections. In the podcast Untimely, journalist and writer Yang Xiao shares her authentic experiences and creative insights from living in Dali, revealing the complex emotions surrounding ideal lifestyles and real-world dilemmas in the pandemic era.

Survivor’s Guilt in a “Utopian Haven”

In 2022, Yang Xiao left Beijing for Dali. While other cities faced pandemic lockdowns, life in Dali remained largely unaffected. This “overly idyllic” setting triggered a sense of “survivor’s guilt” in Yang Xiao. She confesses feeling “undeserving of it all” and began questioning the meaning of her sojourn in Dali.

“My emotions kept shifting because life in Dali was so utopian, it sparked a strange survivor’s guilt.”

In Dali, Yang Xiao met others seeking “healing,” whether from lockdowns or existential confusion, hoping to find new directions. However, she soon realized that “lying flat” was not sustainable. Prolonged isolation from society risked drying up her creative well.

Creation Must Connect with Real Life

Yang Xiao recalls a remark by novelist A Yi at the One-Way Street Literary Festival: “You novelists, don’t always dream of finding a utopian haven. If you move to a place like Dali, thinking you’ll create undisturbed, you’ll find everything dries up. You need to stay connected to life and reality.”

This resonated deeply with Yang Xiao. She recognized that creation thrives on real-life connections, drawing inspiration from daily struggles and sensations. To break free from a “scattered yolk” state, Yang Xiao turned to “wild swimming.” Overcoming her fear of rivers and diving into a reservoir, she rediscovered a sense of freedom and self.

“It was about overcoming something shaped over the past few years, a self-imposed fear. On a small level, using my body to conquer that fear.”

Revisiting History, Reflecting on Era Changes

Beyond her Dali experiences, Yang Xiao shares her deep reflections on German history. Writing about Nazi Germany was “painful” due to its disconnect from her lived experience. In contrast, her book Re-walking allowed her to connect with its characters, feeling the power of a “knowledge community.”

Yang Xiao sees intricate links between history and the present. Revisiting Germany in 2019, she noted significant societal shifts—refugee crises and rising far-right movements—realizing that the “open decade” once taken for granted was perhaps a fleeting historical moment.

“Many things we took for granted, in hindsight, were accidental, maybe just a special decade we happened to live through. It was real, but will it continue? That’s hard to say.”

The Creator’s Path: Independence and Resolve

Yang Xiao also discusses the creator’s survival strategy. She credits her persistence in writing to the success of Re-walking, which provided both spiritual confidence and financial stability. She believes creators should ideally sustain themselves through the market but understand institutional choices, balancing the two to maintain independence.

“If possible, I hope the market can sustain me.”

In an “involuted” creative environment, Yang Xiao emphasizes the importance of “resolve.” Creators must decide what they want and strive for it, maintaining independence and creative passion even amid financial challenges.

Conclusion: Pursuing Freedom and Authenticity

Yang Xiao’s story offers a profound reflection on life, creation, and the era. In the pandemic era, the pursuit of ideal lifestyles is urgent, yet fraught with challenges. Maintaining independence amid real-world dilemmas and seeking truth amid historical shifts are questions every creator must face.